Wednesday 21 March 2007

New college for budding financial shamans

A new college for budding financial shamans has just opened near Bank tube station in the City. At the Chaos College of Finance students will be taught the art of contacting the spirit world for financial gain. Founder Arthur Simmons says, 'I believe there is a real need for something like this. It will give traders and analysts the edge they need in increasingly competitive times.'

Personally, I am a bit sceptical. Can this sort of thing really be taught in a college? I developed my skills over a number of years - years where I was wandering in the desert, staring at the moon, chanting like a madman. I lived in a cave, for Christ's sake. Well, each to their own. If you've got money to burn, go ahead and attend this college, but don't blame me if it doesn't work out.