Monday 5 March 2007

Edmund Rawlings

Obviously, there are very many different ways to make money, and we must all do what we are able to. Some of us drive racing cars on a professional basis. Some of us are mere office clerks. Edmund Rawlings had a particular talent for attracting the ghosts of dead stockbrokers. And that's how he made his fortune. These merchants would come to him in the early hours while he was still asleep, and they would enter him. This outrageous act would invariably wake him up and he would find himself completely paralysed. He could not open his eyes, or even open his mouth to hurl abuse at the ghostly invaders. However, he could use his mind to communicate with them, and that is what he did on numerous occasions.

Fortunately, these stockbrokers of the night were not hellish demons but actually rather friendly chaps who only wanted to help him. It was well known on the other side that Edmund was useless in most areas of life. He could only just about dress himself. The dead stockbrokers took pity on him. Over a period of roughly seven years they were to give him invaluable advice on investing in the stock market. Edmund became a multimillionaire, and his spirit friends - their work done - moved on to pastures new.

Basically, anyone can get rich. Edmund was a moron.