Monday 24 January 2011

A2+B Wealth

What's this? Some sort of test? If A2 added to B equals Wealth, then I don't know or care. No, A2+B Wealth is a new wealth management business launched by two Scottish blokes and their friends at AAB.

Zzzzzzzz. E=MC Square. FAB. The two Scottish blokes responsible for making my mood even darker are Paul Lothian and Jonathan Gibson. They founded Verus Chartered Financial Planners, somewhere in Dundee, in August 2005. Yes, in summer. They should have been on holiday. Instead they were starting up a financial firm in Dundee. In case you're wondering, Verus delivers financial planning and advice that helps clients to achieve and maintain their desired lifestyle through the proper management of their finances and investments.

I wish someone would help me achieve my desired lifestyle, through the proper management of my consciousness. That's the only way I can be helped. Forget the money. It's my mind I'm having trouble with. It's my goddamn soul.

How are Paul and Jonathan going to help me? Verus is Latin for true, real, proper and right. How does that help me? Listening to me is their pleasure. They can hear my voice. Knowing what I get up to in my dreams is their passion. Not leaving me [lonely] in the cold is their promise. Exceeding my expectations is their plan. (They've been thinking about me.) Helping me recover my wits is their purpose in life. It's all they live for. Yet I still feel so BAD.

I feel so LOST. It's my mind. It's my soul. That's where all the trouble is. More about death, less about money. This will pass. It has got to. I remember the old days, last week, when I was reasonably happy.

[I found something on the net yesterday. A piece of information that I had been looking for. Now I wish I could go back to a state of ignorance. Knowledge is pain. I wish I could get it out of my head. It will be there forever, I fear. I will not be able to forget. I want to forget. {I'm too old to join the French Foreign Legion. (I was going to join, a few years ago. I wish I had.)} Now it's just all this, with knowledge I wanted but ...]

Yes, we need to bring out the square brackets for something like that. It's all broken up; my thoughts and my writing. But I go on. I am incorrigible. There is something terribly wrong with me. Or something superhumanly right. I can't decide. My self-awareness has deserted me.

I can't even say it, what I want to say. This is like hell. I reckon I will have to delay my new work schedule until February. There is no way I can function with my emotions all over the shop. I suppose I could try again tomorrow. There is always tomorrow.

[There is one thing I am happy about. No other financial blog has this sort of emotional depth. Name one other financial blogger who is constantly on the verge of a nervous breakdown. You can't.]