Wednesday 1 February 2012

As Fred Goodwin is stripped of his knighthood ...

Michael Fowke says: 'Let's strip ALL the bankers of everything they have. Let's take away their honours, their bonuses, their salaries, their houses, their cars, their nice suits, their watches, their wives, their husbands (eh?), their girlfriends, their boyfriends (whatever), and even their children. Then we can all live in North Korea and fucking starve to death.'

Michael ... Oh, me. I'm Michael Fowke, the world's foremost financial shaman. It is I? Well, obviously. / Let's get another thing straight. I'm certainly no fan of Fred Goodwin. He wrecked a perfectly good bank. However, he hasn't been charged with any criminal offence. The Dead Shark That Refuses To Believe In Death - the FSA, for those of you who aren't familiar with my absurd use of language - hasn't banned or fined him. Yes, Mr Goodwin is an arrogant fool. But, dear reader, can you name one knight who isn't?

Ex-knight, now. / So, what does the future hold for Fred? Who cares?! Maybe he'll fade into obscurity with his money. It'll still be wine, women, and song. That's how the other half live even when they're disgraced. But if Fred wants to redeem himself, I suggest he goes into exile like Lord Byron. He could die fighting for Greek independence. Against the Germans, though. Not the Turks.