Wednesday 21 August 2013

Jeremy Roberts is the head of UK retail sales at BlackRock

My phone company is rolling out 4G soon, but the useless, chiselling pricks can't even get 3G right. I can hardly get a signal on that dongle shit. / So, we're stuck with Jeremy. The only news I could find. 'It's not news, man, that Mr Roberts is the head of UK retail sales at BlackRock. Everyone knows him. He's famous!' He's not famous, Voice, you clown. And that's not the news. The news is that Jeremy reckons bond funds need to be smaller. 'Oh. Why?' Because they won't succeed otherwise. 'And that's the news, is it?' Yes. 'Christ, boss! Where are all the stories of banks going bust, riots in the streets, gold going up to $20,000 an ounce?' Those days are over, my little invisible friend. So I'm afraid it's bond funds needing to be smaller. 'Ha! I think I can understand why you want to be a rock and roll star, Mikey.' Yeah, Voice, I'm getting out of this game. It won't be long now. And the advice I'm giving to all my readers is: Get out while you can, lads! (And the ladies.) You've got enough money. It ain't no fun any more. There are other things you can do. Save yourselves!!!

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I ain't gonna be a rock and roll star. Just a songwriter. That will do. Like Burt. / Everything will be different in Malibu.

Everything will be different in Malibu, No. 144? Yeah, there's no harm in it. After lunch. I'll escape, for a while.

Don't drag me deeper into dull reality. I don't wanna hear about no smaller bond funds.

Did you go to the park yesterday, eh? Did you buy the ice cream? I hope so. You've got to listen to me, man. I've been to parks. I've eaten ice creams. I know how good that lifestyle can be. / I'm the Preacher. Are you in the office again? It's all vanity and vexation of spirit!

Never mind. What does it matter?