Tuesday 7 October 2014

Blue-collar aspiration?

Have a look at this! It's a load of bollocks. How many blue-collar types aspire and get absolutely nowhere? Most, I would say. Only a handful - guys like Alan Sugar - get to live the David Cameron lifestyle. And the thing about Cameron is ... he didn't need to aspire to anything! Everything he has in life was handed to him on a plate. Oh, I wouldn't mind being the prime minister. I think I'll be quite good at it. The next thing he knows? He's prime minister! That would never happen to some character living on the White City estate.

And if you're really rich, you can get corporate welfare - and hardly anyone says a word about it! Except the Guardian.

Oh, I'm in a bad mood this morning. Amazon are using some cowboy courier to deliver my guitar amplifier (to save money, obviously.) The parcel didn't turn up yesterday, but the courier says the driver came to my house and left a card. Bullshit! Absolute bullshit! There was no driver, and no card! I want my amplifier, man, and I want it NOW! Maybe they think I'm a member of the government and that I have the cash to order countless amplifiers. Well, I don't! I want the one I paid for. And I want it today. I'm not made of money.

Of course, this delivery driver didn't go to Eton. I wonder what he aspires to. Maybe he's on the minimum wage, and he dreams of one day earning five pence an hour more. But that's no excuse! Unless he's delivering to a house in Kensington or Knightsbridge (or somewhere like that) he should still do his job properly. Honest men and women, sons and daughters of toil, people like me, are waiting for their fucking parcels! Let's have a bit of decent human decency, yeah?

...

And in other news ... there is no other news. Deal with it. / The news is an illusion, anyway. The truth is, there is never any news. Not really. It's all a con.



Update (7.15pm): I've got my amp, man, and I'm really rocking - as you can imagine. God knows what the neighbours think. 'I've spoken to them, Mikey. They asked me if you had The Who rehearsing in your bedroom!' Ha! Don't be ridiculous, Voice.