Monday 19 October 2015

The FCA has banned Kweku Adoboli!

Oh my God! Why?! What for?! 'This is outrageous!!!' Why has the FCA banned our Kweku from financial services? 'How long for, boss?' I don't know, Voice. It could be for life. 'Life?! Jesus!' What has Mr Adoboli done to deserve this?!

The evil that dead fish do ... / And we all thought the dead shark was out of control, didn't we? 'Er ... the dead shark that refused to believe in death?' That's the one! / But the FCA is even worse. What is our Kweku going to do now?

Life is so unfair sometimes. I've had migraines all weekend. I suppose we all have our crosses to bear. 'Let's hope you haven't got a brain tumour, boss.' Shut up, you little idiot! I really need you on a Monday morning, don't I? / Yes, a Monday morning in winter, dear reader(s). Is it winter yet? 'Well ...' It should be. Actually, I want spring! 'There will be growth in the spring.' Of course there'll be growth in the spring, Voice. All will be well in the garden.

...

I've forgotten about Mr Adoboli already. It's for the best. Let's move on, beyond the horror of finance!

Let's talk about music. 'Yippee!' I'm listening to Elvis Costello's Get Happy!! There are twenty songs on the album, eighteen Costello originals but only two of them are "strong" songs, as it were, or .. as it is. 'Eh?!' New Amsterdam and High Fidelity. [This makes me think I shouldn't scrap my Gilly, Gilly just because I consider it a bit "weak". I haven't got so many songs that I can afford to throw some away.] My favourite lyric on the album? The chairman of this boredom is a compliment collector, I'd like to be his funeral director. 'Ha!'

Guitar? 'Guitar?! Mug's game!' Man, I'm getting fed up struggling with playing lead all the time. What's the point? [I was looking at a forum: someone said that Steve Vai still has to steal money from his mum's purse while a "bad" guitarist like Noel Gallagher is a multi-millionaire. 'Ha!'] I don't even need it as a songwriter. It's just pride, really. I don't know what to do. 'Record your songs, man! Today!' Not with a migraine. Oh, I might ...

Lunch? 'Hungry?' You bet! I want some lunch. I've had pills on an empty stomach. 'Oh dear.' No, that's not good. I need a cheese sandwich ... please!