Wednesday 8 June 2016

Guy Hands is suing Citigroup - again!

Dear oh dear. As you know, reader(s), Guy Hands is one of my bestest friends in the crazy world of finance. Sure, I know he looks a little strange. (I've lost count of the number of times I've urged him to get his head shaved.) And I know he has delusions. (Like thinking he's a rocker on the same level as Jim Morrison. 'Ha!') However, a friend is a friend, you dig? You've got to stick by your friends.

Anyway, EMI. 'It doesn't even exist no more, boss! What the fuck is going on?' Guy is still upset about it, Voice. He's still saying Citigroup told him certain things about ... whatever. I don't know, and I don't care. The guy should have used his own judgement. 'What guy?' Yes, Guy. 'Yes, what guy are you referring to, Mikey?' Guy?! 'That's what I want to know.' I'm referring to Guy. 'Yes, and I'm asking you what guy?' Er ... Guy. 'What fucking guy?!' Guy Hands, Voice. 'Oh.' This post is about Guy Hands, yeah? / Sorry, reader(s), I can't get the staff.

Anyway, EMI. Well, it still sort of exists, I suppose. The point is ... what is the point? I'm confused now. 'Guy shouldn't have paid £2.4 billion for the firm.' Eh? What guy? 'Christ! The guy who bought EMI!' Oh, you mean Guy Hands. 'Yes!' Well, obviously he shouldn't have bought it. But he was willing to pay any price to get a slice of the rock and roll lifestyle, wasn't he?

BECAUSE FINANCE IS SO BORING.

FACT!

Politics, too.

...

Anything else? Politics? Christ! I hate politics, man. Please don't ask me to write about politics. Jesus! H! / However, if you insist, my hellish reader(s) ... 'Come on, Mikey! Give it your best shot!' All right. The Conservatives fighting each other reminds me of that scene near the end of The Blues Brothers where all those police cars are piling up on the highway. Spectacular, entertaining, and ... probably unnecessary - but they can't help themselves!

'Not bad, boss. Music?' Ha! Like Guy, I love music. 'Guy? What guy?' Shut up! That's an old joke, Voice.

Music? I'm just listening to random tracks this morning. Right now, this moment? Nice Dream by Radiohead. The next tune? Heart on My Sleeve by Gallagher & Lyle - unless I change my mind in the next thirty seconds.

My music? I might have another go at that lyric today. Yeah, still haven't got it. Never mind.